Don't Mention The 'B' Word

London is h'expensive, when you have a job. If you don't have a job, the cost of living is prohibitive. Severe cutbacks have been made to my 'budget'. No new clothes, shoes, boots, bags, etc. But the place where I most resent the cutbacks, is the food budget. Not because I want to fill my trolley with all manner of mass produced cakes, and food items, but if you want good quality food, you have to pay for it. Free range chicken costs double that of the intensively reared variety, and the same goes for organic fish.

I have a good fishmongers I go to in Brixton, you know, a cockney family who've been there for donkeys years. A whole sea bass costs a fiver, and same for a bream. Cheap as it sounds, at the moment I can't always afford it. And that pisses me off. I've rediscovered the 'basics' range at Sainsbury's, much to Clarke's consternation. It's not because of the fact that it's cheap, it's more about the florid orange and white packaging which screams STRICTLY FOR PAUPERS!

She takes a packed lunch to school, and I bought the basics orange juice cartons, nine for 97p. Bargain. I suspected it might prompt some teasing at school which was the first thing Clarke said when she spotted them. Brands rule everything, even school packed lunches. But I told Clarke, only you can allow people to make you feel bad about having a cheap drink.
When you haven't got money, you have to be more creative. So we've being baking cakes. Lemon Syrup Loaf from Nigella Lawson's Domestic Goddess book (without all the finger licking and hair flicking) for our packed lunches. Transport is another expense, but I cycle everywhere praying that I don't get lick off my bike, or that I don't get a puncture - it costs a tenner to fix. I walk to Elephant and Castle, and get one bus to work instead of two, or if I take the train to work, I run or walk back.

The upside of having little money is it's helping Clarke to learn the value of it. It was her idea to take a packed lunch, as she said it would be cheaper for me. And I'm lucky, in that both mine and her Dad's family will do anything for her. My mum offered to pay for her lunches (she didn't want her granddaughter having 'free school dinners') but I said we'll see how it goes with the hope that I'll have a job soon. My sister bought her a new jacket for school, her Grandad gave her £20, and her Dad paid for her uniform and her stationery. Her paternal Aunty gave her £100 of Argos vouchers (Xmas then birthday) which bought her TV/DVD, and her Godmother bought her £175 BMX for her 10th birthday. She ain't doing bad at all.

Me? I grew up poor and proud, and making do is what I was raised on. In times of hardship, the training kicks in. Even if I don't buy another item of clothing or a pair of shoes for the next six months, I know I won't look like a tramp on road. Once I get a job, the budget will no doubt go out the window, and I'll be back to living the Lifestyles of the Rich and Not-So-Famous. Or maybe this time, I'll get the hang of budgeting once and for all.